Joiner
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Oh dear, had to laugh.
Several years ago I'd fitted new windows to a cottage in Low Town. I went down the next day to pick up my money and was met by the painter and decorator who proceeded to point to the windows and shout:
"You've used bloody silicone. How the hell do expect me to paint that?"
'It's not silicone.'
"Don't tell me it's not silicone. I've been a painter and decorator for over 40 years and I think I can recognise silicone when I see it. Are you calling me a liar?"
Now I'm over six foot and this guy's about five foot nothing. I suppose it's because I'm of a rather slim build that he felt safe enough to put his face within a foot of mine when he said that last bit. I put mine within six inches of his and said:
'Not a liar. No. Just a bloody idiot.' And turned and went back to my van and came back with the part-used tube of acrylic frame sealant I'd used on the windows which I thrust into his chest. 'Read the front. That bit where it says "overpaintable".'
"Well how the fcuk was I supposed to know?"
I told him he could keep the tube because if he gave it back to me I'd be tempted to shove it up his arse.
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