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DIY Forum >> Carpentry Questions >> Re:Coffins https://www.askthetrades.co.uk/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.pl?num=1148586057 Message started by mr_spanton on May 24th, 2006, 9:55pm |
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Title: Re:Coffins Post by mr_spanton on May 24th, 2006, 9:55pm wrote on May 24th, 2006, 1:02am:
same way as they used to make genuine traditional coffins eh wolf ;D before chipboard venere came along ;) |
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Title: Re:Coffins Post by WOLF on May 24th, 2006, 10:06pm i've made mine!!!!! |
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Title: Re:Coffins Post by mr_spanton on May 25th, 2006, 3:50pm not varnished then I take it ??? ??? ??? ;) ;) Tell us a bit more about it if you will please wolf how did de ye fix the curved sides to the floor so you wont end up on the deck "after the event" ;D if it gave way and the floor fell out?? Is the floorboard slotted into rebates in the sides?? Not sure. But now you mention it I'd quite like to do mine as well. Unless some t**t jobsworth says (to my next of kin) sorry, doesnt come up to H&S sandards, cant use THAT. Whilst I am still "here" might also be a sort of memento mori. Maybe personalised with carving or something ??? ;) |
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Title: Re:Coffins Post by WOLF on May 25th, 2006, 5:36pm well a relative of mine got buried in a cardboard box last year, one of these biodegradable special jobbies, looked like a whicker finish to it, with flowers all stencilled over it, apparently did look rather good!!! (not my taste!!) mine, dovetailed angles corners, rebated floor, and slip fingered mid joint, then planed off, scrapped, light sand, the oiled......plenty of it!! if i get time i want to do some carving on it!! etc, but at the mo it is flat packed away in the loft , to save space else where! my will states it has to be put to gether with instructions attatched(either of me kids knows how!!) , and to be buried in it!!!, stuff any hse rule, let those behind sort it out, i'd have spent to much of my life arguing with toss pots like that!!! to worry about it!!! as once you are in the box, unless there is a CRIMINAL reason, they can not take you out of it!!!!! :o |
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Title: Re:Coffins Post by mr_spanton on May 25th, 2006, 8:09pm what timber did you use?? I always thought oke was traditional, but then I've seen some nice ones made of white pine. exorbitant prices they charge now for a few bits of venereed chipboard I heard that they now have to reduce plastic glues/resins/finishes/plastic trim etc so it dont pollute the air so much when they cremate them. Twas funny the day my grandad got cremated, the 2 attendants were stood out the back door......having a shifty fag ::) ;). Well I saw the funny side, I reckon Grandad would of as well!! ;D |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by woodsmith on May 25th, 2006, 8:43pm I've split this off as a separate topic as we have gone from decking to coffins ::) |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by mr_spanton on May 25th, 2006, 8:55pm I know ::) ;) ;D Its just how my none one track mind works, sorry ;D |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by splinter on May 25th, 2006, 9:14pm I.ve been in the shed all day sorting the timber for my wives so if anyone has got any plans drawings for one ,I would be grateful. Thanks in advance :) |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by WOLF on May 25th, 2006, 9:42pm for wives, see pallet/packing crate!!!!!! ::) ::) ::) ::) Thanks W/S for that!!!nice one!! back to our topic, mine, mostly oak, that i have aquired over the years, and after one particular clear out! well the timber got "used!!" in terms of the glues/resins etc, on the modern computer controlled, (yes even these get compy 's!!) they are monitered to burn at 610° C, so as to burn "clean".. so hot, that impurities are basically vapourised!!! how do i know, worked on Falconwood , and Elmers End crems and being ME!! i ask lots of questions!!! the most notable funeral/crem i went to was my aunts,last year! the pall bearers, were spot on perfect, in step like a military job, not a tear nothing... then they ( the bearers) filled in to the front row of the church, it turned out they were Her kids, and their partners whom i had not seen for over 12-15 years!!! Total admoration for them!!! Quote:
i got one of those, think of something, and whoosh!! off it goes!! ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by Scrit on May 25th, 2006, 10:21pm wrote on May 25th, 2006, 8:09pm:
Nah, elm - but there's a lot less of it these days.... Scrit |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by MarkS on May 26th, 2006, 4:30pm I thought elm as well. I was told the other day that there is still a band of the country around the south downs where Elm grows without problem. Something about the beetles not getting across the down ? true ? Given some peoples diet, impurities in the coffin are the least of the problems for the incinerator. |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by WOLF on May 26th, 2006, 5:41pm pacemakers and any other things like these are LEATHAL, in a crem burner!!! seriously damages everything!!!! [smiley=shocked2.gif] [smiley=shocked2.gif] [smiley=shocked2.gif] [smiley=shocked2.gif] [smiley=shocked2.gif] [smiley=shocked2.gif] |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by woodsmith on May 26th, 2006, 5:45pm wrote on May 26th, 2006, 5:41pm:
Wolf I think the idea is that you are already dead before you get cremated ::) ;D |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by WOLF on May 26th, 2006, 6:02pm yes, but by law these objects shold be removed due to the harmful ness of their ilk!! but occasionally one gets left in, and the state of the burner, after the BANG, well it is a serious mess!!! has been know to kill the crem worker on one occasion!!! see risky business!!!! :o |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by MarkS on May 26th, 2006, 9:23pm Ah yes, one of my fav opening lines from a novel - I dont have it to hand so sorry about the misquote, but the book is the crow road by Iain Banks It was the day my Grandmother exploded. |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by The_Trician on May 26th, 2006, 9:48pm has been know to kill the crem worker on one occasion!!! Maybe - but you'd get 2 for the price of one then! Even if it does ferk all the firebricks! I worked in heavy industry before going on my own - and part of the plant comprised of a big heat-treatment dept. Row and rows of gas furnaces. Fire-lighters would come on on Sunday night to light up for the week and some of us had to be on call-out if they couldn't get all the burners to light. We got so fed up of being called out that we ended up shorting out the fail-safe circuits and telling the lads to wedge the gas solenoids open with a taper of timber whilst lighting up. We never got called out again - but the fire brigade did! One night, some berk tried to light one of the furnaces with a taper of newspaper - trouble was, he hadn't 'purged' the furnace of excess gas from the first time he tried to light it. Anyhow, up goes the furnace door and in goes the lighhted newspaper and WHOOOFF! - Furnace roo is trying to exit the factory roof and it's raining refractory bricks everywhere! How we laughed when we heard about it the next day! I once saw 7 firemen bowled over on their arses when the oil-quench m/c went up - but that's another story! TT |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by mailee on May 28th, 2006, 7:32am I am being buried at sea as my first wife said she would dance on my grave ;D Problem is she scuba dives! |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by billythekid on May 29th, 2006, 8:55pm wolf with your own coffin is there a handle on the inside, i think that would be top of the list when designing it... btk |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by WOLF on May 29th, 2006, 9:29pm Na!! the only time i am going inside it is when i am definately DEAD!!!!! |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by billythekid on May 29th, 2006, 10:51pm screw that, always have a plan B.... i'd install wireless broadband in it too, just in case, dont want to miss the forum now... btk |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by WOLF on May 29th, 2006, 10:54pm wrote on May 29th, 2006, 10:51pm:
i have, in native American Red Indian law the Wolf can/will come back as the eagle!!! |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by JerryD on May 29th, 2006, 10:57pm I haven't even got a plan A :( |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by billythekid on May 29th, 2006, 11:05pm wrote on May 29th, 2006, 10:54pm:
i didnt know you were native american red indian. i had a great wolf/indian/eagle tobacco tin a while ago. next time i'm at a C/W thing I'll get you one of the WOLF jackets a la -- |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by WOLF on May 29th, 2006, 11:17pm Strangely enough i got one of those off the grandkids last year!! BTK! nice thought though! i just like their way of thinking and the original ways of the Red Indians especially their co-existanc with nature... The WOLF, the EAGLE and the TREE.....and i do not mean the likes of the ol' westerns tribes.. Souix, Nav's etc... i mean the real BASE tribes... Menominee (wisconsin) or the Pasca Yaqui tribe (Arizona) |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by billythekid on May 29th, 2006, 11:20pm my mrs is part cherokee, i think the part where the scalping happens.... btk |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by WOLF on May 29th, 2006, 11:33pm [smiley=fryingpan.gif] [smiley=duck.gif] [smiley=duck.gif] [smiley=duck.gif] Part Chrysler Jeep eh?? that's novel!!!! ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D no wonder you look TYRED!!!! ;D ;D |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by JerryD on May 30th, 2006, 12:12am and scalpings go on the drive, don't you know anything about road construction! ::) (the above joke is ever-so-slightly Wolf like.. my apologies ;D) |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by WOLF on May 30th, 2006, 12:23am OI!!!! i resemble that remark do you mind!!!! ;D ;D ;D |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by WOLF on May 30th, 2006, 12:24am Quote:
but only on cheap roads mind!!!! |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by Dewy on Jun 3rd, 2006, 5:25am I heard that cleaning the crem out after a lady with a boob job has passed through was messy work. The silicon bags expand then explode leaving a sticky mess to scrape out. :o |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by WOLF on Jun 3rd, 2006, 10:12pm Hi DEWY, and i hope you are keeping well!!! as for the silly cones, going bang, if the damage causes them to actually shut it down before the end of the actual burn, then the mess can be real grief by all accounts, but if it does NO damage, then the intense heat during the burn will actually get rid of all traces, so it would seem, it depends on how much immediate damage it causes!!!! keep well dear chap! regards Matt |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by Scrit on Jun 4th, 2006, 2:24pm So, is what you're saying is that it's better not to be around on the day they cremate Dolly Parton, then? :o |
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Title: Re: Re:Coffins Post by WOLF on Jun 4th, 2006, 2:28pm what do you think, its bad enough when her bra strap fails!!! :duck: :duck: |
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