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https://www.askthetrades.co.uk/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.pl Public Forum >> Humour >> Tales from aircraft Cabin Crew... https://www.askthetrades.co.uk/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.pl?num=1319552583 Message started by CWatters on Oct 25^th, 2011, 3:23pm

Title: Tales from aircraft Cabin Crew...
Post by CWatters on Oct 25^th, 2011, 3:23pm

http://www.pprune.org/cabin-crew/232080-thick-passenger-comments.html

Quote:

American Lady passenger - "excuse me Sir, but why did your Queen build her Castle so darn close to the airport?"

Quote:

A well dressed lady and her daughter were making their way through the business class cabin into the economy cabin to take their seats. The lady turned to her daughter in front of a CC member and said,

'Darling, if you dont work hard at school and get good grades you will be doing that for a living...' looking at the CC.

As cool as a cucumber the CC member came back with, looking at the child..

'if Daddy had worked harder at school yourself and mummy would be sitting this side of the curtain (looking into the business class cabin)

Quote:

The wife of a friend of mine used to work at Heathrow as Meet and Greet for American passengers who were arriving and being coached on to Southampton to join a luxury cruise.

She once had an American family who refused to get on the coach because they were told by their travel agent that they would get off the plane and get immedialtely onto a boat. They expected to walk from the arrivals hall to a large cruise ship that was parked outside at Heathrow airport. Having been told that their travel agent was incorrect, they still refused to get on a coach or in a taxi.

When you start having conversations with people like "Sir, we are in the middle of London. It's not possible to get a cruise ship that close to the steps of the plane", you know you're having a bad day.

Quote:

CC to passenger in seat 22A: Drink Sir?

Backpacker in 22A: Yeah, beer please.

CC to 22B: Drink Sir?

Methodist Minister in 22B: I would rather be defiled by a dozen wanten women than allow alcohol to pass my lips!

Backpacker to CC: Can I give back the beer? I didn't realise there was a choice!!!!

Title: Re: Tales from aircraft Cabin Crew...
Post by CWatters on Nov 5^th, 2011, 10:07am

Quote:

Another Gulf Air tale;

Shiny "new" Tristar, operating DBX-KHI, entire 1st Class taken over by one of a smaller Emirate's Ruler and male entourage....females in the back, of course.

Party eventually get on board, most carrying hooded falcons from which they could not be parted (yes, it did make a mess, but they paid for the clean-up). Ruler sat alone, dignified, falcon on his arm, looking straight ahead, ignoring the commotion as they all settled.

One of our 700 new cabin staff was in charge of 1st Class, and was doing the rounds with the ceremonial coffee, as was done then in 1st Class (perhaps now as well). She hailed from deepest Essex, was the sort of blonde who puts "Bubbly" on her CV, and she had been trained to make a bright and friendly remark to her passengers as she poured for each one.

When she got to the Ruler, he did not offer much encouragement: he just sat there, staring ahead.

She was undaunted; she thought for a second, and then came out with......

"Does yer budgey talk, then?"