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https://www.askthetrades.co.uk/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.pl Public Forum >> Humour >> 100% - a mathematical approach for meetings https://www.askthetrades.co.uk/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.pl?num=1247645313 Message started by rgirling on Jul 15^th, 2009, 9:08am

Title: 100% - a mathematical approach for meetings
Post by rgirling on Jul 15^th, 2009, 9:08am

A little something someone sent me that is indisputable mathematical logic. It also made me laugh. This is a strictly mathematical viewpoint...it goes like this:

What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%?

Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life? Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

and

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But,

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

and

B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

Look how far ass kissing will take you.

A-S -S -K -I -S-S -I -N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty, that while Hard work and Knowledge will get you close and Attitude will get you there, it's the Bullshit and Ass kissing that will put you over the top. :)

Ray

Title: Re: 100% - a mathematical approach for meetings
Post by big_all on Jul 15^th, 2009, 10:27am

i would just sit quietly in the background and score 109

Title: Re: 100% - a mathematical approach for meetings
Post by woodsmith on Jul 16^th, 2009, 7:16pm

Brilliant ;D