Who's crawling where?!.. there's to be no babies in the forum please, this isnt kindergarten

Your quite right Zamb, there is way too much technical talk, but at the end of the day it's a technical "scientific" type subject. Unfortantely it doesn't matter how much you simplifiy it sometimes it doesn't make much difference.
As you point out, some people don't know the difference between fuse boards and CU's, plugs and sockets, fuses and circuitbreakers. But it does make a big difference as we all know, different jobs for different devices performing different tasks.
That's why it helps all of us if a picture is available, speaks more than words, of-course it's always best to call an electrician in if someone is having difficuilty, un-like plumbers (sorry guys!), it shouldn't cost the earth to have someone check it out. In greater london I would charge £45.00 (no vat) and should be able to diagnosis most problems with equipment at hand in less than one-hour.
Now please, get out from under MY rock Z, I'm just not prepared to share it right now, times are hard